Say Yes/No Like a Native

I was wearing my Michael Kors black hills; so, I could not walk fast. Anyhow, I managed to arrive only ten minutes late. There were people everywhere. Fabio had thrown this party to introduce his new girlfriend. He asked me if I would like a glass of Mojitos and I said: “Sure, thanks”. Then, he offered me some snacks. But I noticed all snacks have sausages and guess what! – I was on my vegetarian diet this week. So, I did not take any snacks and politely said: “I’m okay, thanks.’”

Five minutes later, Fabio patted me on the back and told me: “Come on Cristina don’t be shy, please help yourself! or even better let me get you something.”. In no time, he got me a plate filled with snacks. And there I was looking at him with wandering eyes and told him: “I’m all good Fabio, thanks.”.

But obviously, he didn’t understand what I really meant because he kept insisting and explaining how good the snacks are. And there I was thinking what to say to make it clear that I don’t want any snack. Finally, I had to say: “No!”. In a casual situation, I wouldn’t refuse a friend like that because it is rude to decline an offer with a straightforward no. In other words, it can be even offensive especially if someone is trying to be nice to you. But Fabio didn’t seem to be upset at all, after I said no, he passed the plate to another friend and started to explain how he had got the recipe from his nonna.

Later, I noticed Fabio is making so many common mistakes that a non-native speaker would make. Well, he didn’t speak too bad, he just sounded unnatural and sometimes confusing.

You see English especially American English, ninety percent of the time is casual, and people don’t really speak like textbooks. While a language learner studies grammatical rules, which aren’t always the best source to rely on. Of course, spoken English is different from textbooks in many ways.

Well, a common mistake that a non-native speaker makes is to think because ok means yes, I’m okay means yes too. Well, it is exactly the opposite, in fact a native says: “I am okay” to decline an offer in a polite way. Also, I’m all good carries a negative meaning and means No when it comes to respond an offer. Meanwhile, there are many ways to say yes like a native and it is not necessarily by using the “Yes” word. You see, using yes is correct but unnatural most of the time, especially in an informal situation. Like if a friend asks you: “Do you like pizza?” you can say: “yup/yeah/yea”.

Or do you like to come over for a beer? – sure/sounds good/I’d love to/why not.